:: reflexive ::
"what is it that frightens you so about looking inwards?". i kept looking at her plate, thinking that it takes an amazing amount of courage to decide to abandon one's self to a new array of sensible experiences without having the possibility of taking a step back, without having the possibility to stay hidden in the shadows of the outer world. i often find myself running from things that seem to hold some degree of significance in reference to where i stand and where i should be standing, but run as i may, i am not able to escape. the lack of focus in her look revealed perhaps more that what was to be expected, nothing would be as it used to, for every barrier thrown down between the world and her, one stood between her understanding of it and my capacity for doing so. maybe i am simply a coward, maybe i fear having to look, having to hear, having to take off this bubble. how is it that one comes to face one's self in such manner? how i wish i could be that brave.
coming in through my ears::Fuckin' with my head//Beck